The Grinch

Am I still alive...in a word yes. Back to school for 3 weeks now and we are just getting in some last minute tests before a short holiday break. The holidays won't be quite like normal due to having some major exams the day we return to school on Jan. 4th. Bah humbug.

My Thanksgiving break was awesome and I was very sad to see it end, but I did have a great trip out East, did some fun biking and overall just decompressed a lot. It feels so long ago already.

It hasn't taken me long to recompress however, as this quarter is going to be my hardest to date for sure.

I am currently taking Pharmacology 2, Physiology 2, Microbiology, EKG, Clinical Medicine Labs, Clinical Medicine 2, Women's Health, Preparation for Clinical Practice, and a dumb InterProgram Core Medicine class. Each of these classes have multiple exams except for the last one so I am a little busy to say the least.

Winter in here...it was 75 and sunny this weekend. I know I know, I should miss winter...but I don't so there you have it. I got out for a 1.5 hr ride and it was LOVELY. Due to the weather and the studying, I haven't really found my Christmas cheer yet. Maybe when I ship off to Ohio on Tuesday I will find it in the 2 inches of snow. I have exactly one night to purchase all and I mean ALL of my Christmas presents for my family after my last exam on Monday before flying out on Tuesday.

I am soooo screwed.

Happy Holiday!!!

Soooooo happy.

Finals are done. Seven finals in 6 days...brutal. I am still delirious but 'oh so happy'.

Heading off to grab a brew and listen to some live music.

Hopefully my brain muscle will get a break and my body muscle can take over for two weeks. I am going to ride till I puke tomorrow...it will be awesome.

Close

I can almost taste the dirt and sweat that is awaiting my return to fun outdoor activities following finals this week.

Five days, six tests...let's do this thing. This Friday can't come soon enough.

I promise to post at least one outdoor action shot, maybe even some blood if I get lucky enough to fall off my bike :)

TIREDDDDDzzzzz...Snort..

I am burnt out and sick right now...but there is no rest for me yet. I got up at 4:30 am for a test this morning and am feeling it right now. I have two weeks of school and then finals left in this quarter. This is by far the hardest mental challenge I have ever done. The amount of information I am cramming in is ridiculous...

I worry, how much will I retain? Will I feel like an idiot when I start clinical rotations next June? How am I already almost halfway through the didactic (classes) portion of my education? This seems exceptionally fast.

I have learned how to do a complete physical exam, including and up to a well woman's gynecological exam. We practice on standardized patients, and that was an experience to say the least.

I have a fun finals week coming up with exams Friday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday plus an additional full physical exam on a patient which will fall on one of those days. Sort of makes me want to crawl in a hole, but mostly that is lack of sleep talking and the fact that I want to be in bed with a horrible head cold rather than sitting up studying for 6 hours a night.

Am I whining...maybe just a tiny tiny bit...but sometimes you just need to eat ice cream and cry ya know?

These nerve lesions aren't going to learn themselves so I am need to get back to it. Also damn the heart, it is a complicated crazy little organ that takes a lot of studying to understand. To bad 27% of us will end up dying from it's malfunction.

Need bed...must study.

Is it already nearly October?

Apparently it is almost October. Time flys when you are having fun or stuck in a bubble of "learnens".

Definition of "THE BUBBLE": when life receeds as I sit in the library on a Friday night and only when I get up to leave at 10 pm do I feel tired or hungry or in the need of a work out and only then do I remember that I have an hour drive home to a home and a husband.

My transformation is becoming complete into full on random medicinal fact robot girl. World domination is following shortly behind.

This quarter is pinging along nicely, with many of my classes interweaving each other in order to fully maximize my brain's potential. Pharmacology feeds directly into Physiology which is highlighted by Neurology. Pathology is the bottom line on learning Physical Diagosis and is rounded out by Epidemiology or the study of infectious diseases and how they trend. My final class Pediatrics sort of incorporates all of the above in how child growth and develop and how things can and do go wrong.

As far as work-life balance, I am fully committed to this year as a year off of life so I just fit in whatever I can when I can. Mostly this means gym time but I do get out for one mountain bike ride per week. For whatever reason, I feel like I get better on my bike every time I ride. I still think I am dialing in the whole clipless pedal thing and so my climbing is improving with each ride.

Tom and I had our two year anniversary this week. Two years ago, I was dragging him to 400 foot falls in poring rain storms and we were clinging to the edge of a zodiac raft in 10 foot waves. Good times. Life is quite different now than it was then, but Tom is my rock in a sea of change and we are in everything together. Cheers to being such an awesome husband Tom and to letting me "practice" eye and nose physical exam skills on ya and only yelling "you're blinding me..AHHHH" a couople of times.

Peacenout. Some pics from a lazy Ohio ride with the fam during my last trip home in August.

Today, I shall write.

I will give you two words in which to base your judgement of me: surviving and thriving.

I will give you one word in which to base your judgement of this blog: dead.

It is hard to understand why I am not blogging at all. Part of it is obvious...I don't have a whole lot of extra time. But really it is more than that, because I could jot off a quick blog entry every couple of days or even weekly and it wouldn't take that much time.

I think part of it is the feeling of the unnecessary. I started blogging for three reasons: 1. Boredom...in massive amounts, due to sitting in front of a computer for hours every day while hating it. 2. Because I was making a conscious and very real effort to live my real "non cube" life in exciting ways in which I was was taking lots of cool pictures, pushing myself to learn new things and experience Arizona for all it's glory. 3. I wanted to write as a catharsis for the feelings of unsatisfaction of the career/life path I was on and the exploration of determining what I wanted my new path to be.

These reasons have faded with a new challenge, more intellectually based than adventurous, and a feeling of immense rightness in that direction I am heading. I have still gotten out and explored some cool things, but I haven't been taking as many pictures, and I have felt the need to savor these special rare moments of nature to only myself.

I don't really want the blog to die, because I think it still serves it's purpose and I am proud of the history I have solidified through it. But it may be on hiatus, pending desire to write, because I don't see much point in writing simply to alleviate guilt for not.

Who knows what time will tell?

Also, on an aside, I completed my first quarter of school, passed my classes and got pretty damn good grades in all reality. I am now in a new set of challenging classes, that are much more related to real medicine, diseases, treatment and assessment and I really like it. Time is FLYING and my previous life with computers seems so distant to the bubble I have immersed myself in.

Thanks for still reading, most likely via Google Reader.

Cranial Nerve X

POP QUIZ: Where is Hannah?

A). She was kidnapped by aliens.

B.) She fell off her bike and broke all fingers and can't type with her tongue.

C.) She is stuck in the middle of finals week and can't wait until next Thursday when she will have a glorious 10 days off from the endurance sprint that is known as PA school.

If you guess correctly, you can help yourself to a cookie from the jar of will it never end.

Here are some photos from the trip to Fossil Creek I took a couple of weekends ago when I pretended like I didn't have studying to do. We camped in hammocks by the river and it was glorious.

Where did La Chaser go?

Ummm yeah....so about the blog....

Sort of haven't had any time to write lately. Or hike. Or bike. Or do any sort of "fun" activity. My life has been consumed with school. I go from one test to another with the feeling of cram between each one. I am surviving and thriving, but it takes a lot of work.

I have discovered, that I am smart enough and hard working enough and have enough dedication to studying to succeed in my classes. But it takes all my time. I really really have no life. I have also learned that I can study for 12 hours straight...seriously not a problem, flys by. I have also learned that I can actually survive on four hours of sleep, but it takes a lot of caffeine.

But the good news is, I have almost learned the entire body anatomically. I know every nerve, vessel, muscle, and bone in the body from the neck down...in eight

weeks. Finals are in three weeks and then I get a week off before coming back to even harder and more exciting classes.

I just had the priviledge of buying my first diagnostic set and stethoscope so I can now do a physical exam. I should the the hit at parties from here on out, listening to beer course through people's bladder.

Since I don't have any exams for a couple of weeks, I am getting out of town this weekend to camp by a lake on Friday night, and camp beside a waterfall on Saturday night. It is going to be glorious. It is amazing how 12 weeks of siting in a library makes you so grateful just to get out for a hike let alone camp.

But as I have said in most of my posts lately, each and every day I am more confident in my decision for this career. I actually may get to have a job I love some day. Glory be.

Have a grrrreeeeeaat weekend ladies and gentlemen. This is where I will be:

Changes.

On Friday I was conducting a mock chief complaint, history, and review of systems with a paid actor who happened to be an older man complaining of a red eye. Our school hires people to be difficult and they video tape us to see how we handle things. As he started yelling at me when I asked him about his sexual history (we were supposed to), I realized how bizarre the whole situation was. Five weeks ago, I wasn't talking to elderly men about how they can't get it up anymore.

Funny how quickly life can change. I can honestly say I am really starting to LOVE school. It is still ridiculously fast and requires studying all the time, but it feels more right every day.

Big test tomorrow morning on the abdomen, and chest so I must peace out. Lata.

A Day in the Life of a PA Student.

There is a reason that I have all but dropped off the face of the earth. Let me give you a taste of today which I assure you is very much the norm during the week. It changes on the weekends where it is just study for 14 hours straight.

6 am - Up, pack clothes to wear to school, lunch, coffee, and bookbag.

6:30 - 7:30 am - Out the door for my 1 hour commute while listening to anatomy lectures.

7:30 am - Workout at school gym, shower, eat breakfast. Study while on bike, ellipitical.

9 -12 pm - Three hours of behavioral medicine class (replace with Biochemistry on other days except for Thursdays when class starts at 8 instead of 9).

12 pm - Lunch for a blissful 30 min.

12:30 pm - Prepare for anatomy class at 1.

1 - 3 pm - Two back to back anatomy lectures.

3 - 5 pm - Cadaver Dissection Anatomy Lab

5 - 8 pm - Study at library.

8 - 9 pm - Drive home while listening to Biochemisty lectures.

9 - 9:30 pm - Stop at store for a couple of groceries.

9:30 - 10 - Dinner....STARVING.

10 - 12 am - More study. Possibly say hi to husband.

12 am - 6am - Hopefully sleep unless early exam requires I get up earlier than normal.

Did you see the blog time built in there? I didn't either. So check out some archives, look at some cool photos of Arizona and check back in the third week of August for my week long break where I assure you I will be doing something TBD (but I promise it will be hella awesome).